Actions>Words

In Manning's story, Brad and his dad were lucky to have an activity they both enjoyed and communicated through. This helped their relationship grow and flourish. The characters in both stories were trying to identify themselves with their parents and engage in an activity that they were able to communicate their relationship through. Not all languages are of words. A language can be spoken through actions/activities, such as with arm wrestling. Arm wrestling was an activity that both the father and son communicated through. Love doesn't always have to be expressed in words, cards or letters, it's what you do for the other person that shows you really love them. One can tell someone they love them all the time, but if they aren't willing to spend time with them or support them, those words of love are empty and are just a superficial gesture. Even though Manning's father didn't tell him he loved him verbally, he spent time helping him excel and supporting him in physical activities he himself enjoyed as well.

When I was younger, my dad taught me how to play the Harmonium (Indian instrument) and sing the hymns that go along with it. He was one of the few parents in the class (at Temple) that really took interest in my abilities and wanted to see me succeed. He is the reason for much of my success today, not just in Harmonium/singing, but in general. Whenever I need advice or have to stay up late finishing something, he is always there to help me get through it. My parents are always so encouraging and willing to sacrifice things they may want to see me excel and reach my dreams. Thinking about it, my parents act largely in accordance to our [my brother and I] necessities. For example, the main reason we even moved to Troy was due to the fact that my parents want us to have a bright future and in order to do so,  wanted us to attend some of the best schools in the state. Both my parents rarely compare me with anyone; they want me to be the best person I can potentially be. I truly admire that and I am only who I am today because of them. My parents always tell me they love me; but even if they didn't, I would know that they did because actions really do speak louder than words.

The fresh breeze hurled past their bodies, and sent small chills all across.

The sun’s warm rays shine generously on their faces.

The woman’s long skirt is fluttering in the wind. She is holding close to her a little boy dressed in a blue color as deep as the ocean’s.

She is holding him away from the danger of the waves. She is afraid he will go too far.

This is a gesture.

A gesture of love.

One that the boy does not understand.

He is thinking that this woman will not let him go and enjoy rich dark waters of the ocean.

He watches the other children left unattended and wonders, Why can’t I be them? What makes them different?

The woman is still holding the delicate and tender arm of the young child.

A child that is not her own. She is only watching over him.        

She thinks, How long will this last?

Then she thinks long term.

She’ll go home tonight and she’ll see the boy tomorrow. But what about when the boy is older and without need of her help? When will she see him then?

She hopes the boy loves her enough to never let her go.

Never leave her sight.

After all, he has spent more time with her than he has with his own mother. Too selfish, she thinks, I’m being too selfish. This is my job and that is all.

But she is human. She cannot help but get attached to another. Especially another person she spends most of her time with.

She finds the fault in herself, when really,

it is human nature.

The boy does not realize the love this woman gives her will end someday. She will have to leave. He takes her for granted.

He then says “Nanna” in that sweet and innocent voice that floods the woman’s ear with love. She tries not to think of how much she loves him but hearing this, she realizes the vastness of it.

No words are exchanged. Only the love for one another flows both ways.

The boy stands in his caretaker’s warm grasp and watches the serenity of the waves and the gentle manner in which they approach him only to go back again into the distance.
The woman watches the boy who is watching this and takes pleasure in his awe.

Your culture is what makes you unique and who you are. Embrace it.

       In "Fish Cheeks" by Amy Tan, Amy's biggest desire is to assimilate into the culture and to become just like everyone else. But what's special about being the same as everyone else? Where's the uniqueness in that? Those are the questions Amy doesn't ask herself. To impress Robert, trying to be American is the ideal thing to do. She shows her disgust to her own culture's foods and customs. But how can someone respect her if she can't even respect herself and her culture? Balancing the two cultures is very important. Growing up in America, I have learned that finding the perfect balance is necessary to get the "best of both worlds."

       Your culture is your way of life, your beliefs and customs and what makes you who you are. Through culture, you can express yourself and your background. Without learning about and following culture, it is easy to get lost and turn to unacceptable ways of expression. It is also easy to assume a lot about other cultures. For example, someone from a foreign country moving to an America may make several false assumptions about American culture; you know your culture best, so you should embrace it. Your culture gives you a proper identity that you can retain while still assimilating into American culture. To live a fairly normal and progressive life in a new country like America, assimilating is important; but remembering that a perfect balance can be achieved is even more important. The the country will accept you and your culture just like you accepted their culture.

Why is Perception so different from Identity?

       Why is perception so different from identity? Identity and perception share a strong relationship and have the potential of being total opposites of each other. Identity is how one defines oneself or what they want others to identify them as. Perception is how one views and understands other people, ideas or things. The perception of a single concept can differ from person to person depending on the circumstances. For example, media distorts the perception of true beauty by portraying beauty to be perfection, when in actuality, that is not true nor realistic. People view this portrayal of beauty and try their hardest to live up to those standards, not knowing how unrealistic it all is, only to fall down hard when they cannot reach them. They feel as though they are the ones lacking something.
       Though she has MS, Mairs identifies herself to be a woman who is just like any other woman her age, in that she does all the same things they do. However, people don't perceive her for who she is but see her only for her disease, or "Ms. MS" (Mairs 4). As aforementioned, people's perceptions are distorted largely by the media. For example, advertisements don't even show disabled people using their products in fear that abled people might mistake it for a product that only disabled people use. Films and television shows, however, focus mainly on the character's disability and not who they are as a person. What is society really gaining by portraying these "perfect" people in the media? Those people aren't "real." We are--and so are all the imperfections we may have, because that's just a part of life and it's what makes us human.